Funky Monks: Song & Lyrics

Although a monk’s life seemed tough, it wasn’t all so bad once the Bishop has turned his back…!

Song from Series 2 Episode 11.


Welcome to our monastery, please have a chair.

Good to see you monks so deep in prayer.

Once the praying’s finished your chores must be done

The main rule of a good monk’s life is no fun.


We have to pray eight times a day, seven days a week

And copy all these manuscripts In writing so antique

I’ll finish off this letter ‘A’ once I’ve ploughed our field,

Milked the cows, mucked the sows, vegetables peeled.


I’ll be doing that and praying too.

Very well gents, I’ll bid you adieu.

Advenium regnum tuum.


(Okay brothers, I think he’s gone)

Now the bishop’s not around, throw off these religious gowns

Hunky, chunky, funky monks get down!

It’s not all hymns and prayin’, it’s not all work and no playin’

So let’s start misbehavin’ and get with the funk!


We love to have a party,

Eat food that is hearty.

Let’s get the boozin’ started

Drunk like a monk!

Play that monky music, funk boy!


Just wanted to check

That during my absence

You’re honouring your

Mealtime vow of silence.


Although we didn’t oughter

We liked to hunt and slaughter,

Don’t need no bread and water

Just funk, funk, funk!


Monastery is jumpin’!

Party beat is thumpin’!

Just lacks a certain somethin’-

A funky nun!

Get in the party habit, girlfriend!


It’s true that life is tough here,

But you obey the rules that is clear.

That’s why we’re a place of great repute-

What’s this? I see we have a new recruit


Welcome to our monastery,

What’s your name?

She- he can’t talk and his name is… Wayne


Ah men!